| Posted by: Rant at June 28, 2008, 12:30 am | | Topic: All Outta BubbleGum: The B-Action Movie Thread Forum: JoBlo | | (Wrote this on the 'Wanted' page, but figured it could go here to) I first read the 'novel' a couple years ago and immediately fell in love with it. I am a big Chuck Palahniuk fan and the grass roots of the comic read very much like 'Fight Club'. After finishing it I became an instant Mark Millar fan and have collected everything he has done since. So, naturally when I heard that there was to be a film adaptation on 'Wanted' I was super fuckin' stoked... that was until I heard later that it has practically jack-zip-shit to do with the source material. But, I went to see the film for 2 reasons: 1. I am a 'need to know' type of guy... I had to know what it was like. 2. To support the ever fading 'R' rated action film. So, I just got back and I have to say, it was about what I expected. 'POSSIBLE SPOILERS' .:Good:. 1. The intro shootout was bloody fabulous, even though the window smashing shit was played out in Bekmambetov's last two flicks. 2. I really dug the 'Escape form the Pharmacy' scene. It was stylish, fast-paced, violent and funny. 3. The 'Post-Rat's' storm of the factory. As a rabid action fan, there was no way for me not to enjoy myself here. That's about it. .:Bad:. Keep in mind, that I am a fan of the Comic... This makes me both bias and bitter. 1. No Super Villains. Immediately 80% of the comic's plot gone. This is a problem for me, as the comics plot is bitchin'. 2. They filled that 80% gap with trite, predictable nonsense: Bullet Bending - That Stupid-Ass Thread/Fate bullshit - a ridiculous un-inspired sequence featuring a train that they took straight out of Spider-Man 2's aborted footage and exploding Rats... Seriously, what the fuck was he thinking with those? 3. The Voice over--I can't put my finger on it, it almost seems like it is James McAvoy the actor was reading for Wesley rather than AS Wesley, I'm not sure how better to put it. 4. What happened to Angelina Jolie? I know I am committing Fan Boy blasphemy here, but WOW... she is NOT attractive to me anymore. She looks like Jack Skellington--Brad Pitt's special sauce must be filled with slim fast. Get Skinny McNeedzaSammich a stuffed-crust pizza and bring back the voluptuous non-veiny 'Gia' Joile from my high-school fapping days. Sorry to be gross, but come on. 5. Can we PLEASE find someone other than Danny Fuckin' Elfman to do a Comic Book Movie Score? How many times must we hear the same crap he wrote back in 1989? 6. Um, you got the go ahead for the 'R' rating yes? How about adding in some of those 100 or so kills you left out Bekmambetov? Shit, I'm TRYING to get my Wargasim on here. 7. Did Paul Greengrass co-direct? Knock of the Shaky-Cam Shit Please. 8. Healing Wax... Once was too much. 9. Finally, Film Wesley is still a giant gaping pussy compared to Comic Wesley. And I quote Richie Cusack: How do you fuck that up? It was right on the page... just copy it, not that hard. 5 outta 10 (Rant Over and Out) |
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